you might be a republican if...
Larry Johnson at TPM Cafe borrows Jeff Foxworthy's schtick to help you determine whether you are a Republican. Funny, but he forgot a couple of points.
If you can say with a straight face that the estate tax that hits under 1% of Americans is unfair (and even then leaves 85% of the estate to the heirs), you might be a Republican.
If you can forget your own college days (or Congressional days, like Foley's or Gingrich's or Livingston's) to tell people that abtsention is the only acceptable form of birth control, even to the point of de-emphasizing the role of condoms in preventing disease, you might be a Republican.
If you got hundreds of thousands or even millions of dollars from Jack Abramoff but now can't quite be sure whether you've even met him, you're either in a state of extreme amnesia or you might be a Republican.
If you urge young women not have an abortion, but don't see any need to provide access to adequate health care or schools for the children, you might be a Republican.
If you claim to be pro-life on abortion, but are ready to execute criminals, and don't see any contradiction in those positions ("culture of life"?), you might be a Republican.
If you can actually give speeches in public lamenting the fact that Strom Thurmond didn't win the Presidency and otherwise engaging in carefully coded racism, you might be a Republican.
I could go on, but it makes me depressed.
If you can say with a straight face that the estate tax that hits under 1% of Americans is unfair (and even then leaves 85% of the estate to the heirs), you might be a Republican.
If you can forget your own college days (or Congressional days, like Foley's or Gingrich's or Livingston's) to tell people that abtsention is the only acceptable form of birth control, even to the point of de-emphasizing the role of condoms in preventing disease, you might be a Republican.
If you got hundreds of thousands or even millions of dollars from Jack Abramoff but now can't quite be sure whether you've even met him, you're either in a state of extreme amnesia or you might be a Republican.
If you urge young women not have an abortion, but don't see any need to provide access to adequate health care or schools for the children, you might be a Republican.
If you claim to be pro-life on abortion, but are ready to execute criminals, and don't see any contradiction in those positions ("culture of life"?), you might be a Republican.
If you can actually give speeches in public lamenting the fact that Strom Thurmond didn't win the Presidency and otherwise engaging in carefully coded racism, you might be a Republican.
I could go on, but it makes me depressed.
posted by Don Q Blogger at 9:36 PM
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